Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
