bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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