They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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