he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
