Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
