Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
