I can't breathe out the right side of my face
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
