you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
