I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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