I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
