I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
