alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
