That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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