drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
