How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Randomize
