Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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