I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
