Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
