3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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