Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
