dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
