Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
