that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Randomize
