I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
