rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Randomize
