I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Watching her eat just hurts me
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
