just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
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