the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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