I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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