New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
