Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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