you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
another moral hangover. fuck.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
