was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
