So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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