why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
is wine microwaveable?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
