Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I just gargled with NyQuil
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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