My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
The adults are the big ones right?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
