Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
