This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
It's never too late to be topless.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
