at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
