She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
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