is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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