office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
