He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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