Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
