I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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