Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
porn star boner night. come get it.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
