the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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