the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He keeps bees of course he's weird
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
