So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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